You know what I'm "nervous" about? The day it's all over.

"I awoke twelve days after the honeymoon, lit a cigarette and reached for the quickly disappearing bottle of Jack Daniels I had stored in my underwear drawer. After dressing the dogs in their typical garb those days - pink chiffon wedding gowns designed by a student of Vera Wang - I settled into my morning routine...checked the registries to see what in the list of dwindling gifts had been purchased for us, studied the wedding photographs for new details, cut myself a brownie, no, make it two (who cared? there was nothing left to try and fit into, nobody would be calling me "beautiful bride" any time soon), and laid on the couch for the first cry. Today's tragedy? I had an engagement party to go to in two weeks. It wasn't for me. I knew I had to get over the post-wedding depression, but Oprah would be good that afternoon, and maybe I'd be ready to go to work the next day. Probably not."

-Excerpt from "The Honeymoon's Over: A Rough Guide to Life After the Wedding" by Cara Rotondaro