Unemployed

I got laid off last week. I feel very relevant. Very 2009. I was working part time - three days a week - so the let down isn't going to be as hard as it would have been had I been working full time. Still, those days were a big deal for me. I'd always assumed I would go back to work full time after my maternity leave. When I didn't, I had to adjust my life outlook.

I liked it, though. I liked having free days to spend with Nora, although non-working days are, to be honest, sometimes hard for me. I know that sounds like complaining about having too much ice cream, but it's true. This is why I think motherhood is tough, especially when moms stay at home (working parents obviously face challenges of their own, but that would take a whole other post.) Not only does the job require constant attention almost 100 percent of the time, but it can be a little isolating. You miss the intellectual stimulation of a day out. Yeah, yeah, I'm sure your day at the office was hard, too, but did you get poop on your hand? No? Then I don't want to hear about it.

Also, an individual's personality comes into play and unstructured days are definitely not my strength. I tend to excel at days where you have 2 or 3 or maybe 4 things planned and you've got to figure out how you're going to do them all.

So that's my immediate worry, I guess. That I've suddenly been thrown into a new lifestyle and I'm worried I won't handle it well. Beyond the lack of income, and the fact that the journalism field is really floundering right now and I don't know how or when I'm going to get another job, that's the issue: an endless expanse of unstructured days spent mostly at home.

Breathe in, breathe out.

On the other hand, I realize how totally ungrateful I sound complaining about something like this. Here I am, living in a house, with food and clothes and a very supportive family, with my wonderful husband and daughter - who is AWESOME to hang out with, by the way - and I'm like, "Really? Temporary joblessness? I don't think that's gonna work out." Come on, woman, get a grip.

I know, too, that there are many mothers who make the most of this situation. They are not only incredibly moms, but incredible people in general.

Realistically, I know that this will be a little blip on my own personal timeline. That I should shut up and enjoy it and wait for whatever comes next.

So, with "Ulysses" in hand (it's definitely time), and an open mind, that's what I'll do.

Regarding all the rapidly appearing teeth

This morning while at a local diner that has been a mainstay since I first got pregnant, J and I looked over at Nora, who was quietly nestled in her carseat, to discover that she was, literally, eating her board book. As in there was a piece of the book in her mouth and she was chewing it, you know, like "Hey, I'm having breakfast, too! It's cool." After retrieving the mangled bit of cardboard from her mouth, we noticed the book was Eric Carle's "The Very Hungry Caterpillar." Fitting.