About a month ago J and I were on a plane home after attending a friend's wedding. We were sitting next to a guy, probably about our age, and we struck up a conversation with him and talked throughout the flight. He was getting married in just a couple weeks, and so we talked about our wedding, and his plans, and then the conversation turned to kids so we told him that we had a two-year-old daughter and another one on the way. He asked if we were going to find out what the baby was, and we said yes, definitely.

Then he said something that a lot of people say. He said that when it came time for he and his wife to have children, he figured he wouldn't want to find out the sex of the baby before it was born. He said, "There are just so few surprises left in life."

I totally get why people want to wait to find out. First of all, that's got to be an amazing moment, when your baby is born and the doctor exclaims "It's a girl!" or "It's a boy!" That's a ton of excitement all at once - an amazing moment you'll never forget. I can think of a ton of reasons for waiting and I admire people who do.

But saying that there are "so few surprises left" isn't really accurate, in my opinion.

First of all, there are totally surprises!

If you're talking strictly about medical-type surprises - as in, we aren't as often surprised with advanced fatal conditions in this day and age because of improved technology - well, those weren't cool surprises to begin with.

But if you're talking about the good kind of surprises, I think you're wrong. I'm surprised almost every day. Sometimes the surprises are little, like when J brings me a cup of coffee just as I'm waking up, before I've even gotten out of bed. Or when someone sends you flowers. Little yet so great. Some of the surprises are big. Like when you a fantastic job offer. Or you get engaged. Or, regarding this specific topic, when you find out you're pregnant.

The other thing is that even if you find out what you're having halfway through the pregnancy, it's still a surprise. You're just getting the surprise a little earlier. I will totally admit that the reason I've opted to find out with both pregnancies is that I just can't wait. I CAN'T wait. You people who can wait? You are incredible! But also crazy. In a good way, though, I mean it.

When people bring up the "so few surprises" thing, I feel like it implies that I don't like surprises. Surprises are the best. And so far 2010 has been such an awesome, surprising year. And it just keeps getting better.

Guys, I love surprises.

And this morning, during my 19-week ultrasound, I was surprised.

We're having a...boy!

A while back I decided it might be prudent to get a new car, replacing my 2003 Hyundai Elantra that has a tape deck. I went through all the reasoning associated with making such a purchase, like that it would be great to have a car with better safety features, and that I might like to get a bigger car like a wagon, especially because then I could take the dogs places, instead of having my 75-pound pit bull mix basically sit half-on my daughter while we drive, and that I'd like to get something reliable that I could drive for years and years.

But people, let's be honest, I really just want a car that offers something better than a tape deck.

Thus began the car searching that has, I'm going to admit to you right now, reached a state of obsession on my part. I've driven a lot of cars over the years. There was my dad's Toyota Tercel that I totaled when I was 16. Then there was the beloved used Honda Accord I drove after that and throughout college until it died in a grocery store parking lot in North Carolina. I traded it in for my Honda Civic, which was fantastic, until I crashed it into a car trying to make a left right in front of me on a two-lane highway (not my fault, for the record, lest you all fear getting in the car with me ever again). No one was hurt, thank God, but the car - just on the brink of being scrapped - was never the same again. Then we traded that in and J and I shared the Prius, until we came up here to New Haven and I decided it wasn't practical to have one car, and because it was very cheap and right in front of me, I bought the Hyundai.

I haven't had the greatest luck. The two Hondas were also both broken into. My mom backed into the Hyundai one day when we were sitting in the driveway. Just right on into it. I never got the body work done to fix it because I kinda didn't care. Because when your car has a tape deck and tinted windows, you're kinda like, "Weeeeeeellll whatever."

So all these things are playing into this decision and it's all making me a little crazy. Like, I have to love this new car, whatever it is. LOVE IT. There are also a few musts:

1. The car must be stick shift. 2. The car must not be silver. 3. The car must have something better than a tape deck. 4. The car must have power locks. 5. Cecilia must be able to comfortably lounge in the back.

So far I've test-driven a Subaru Outback, liked it a lot, then proceeded to fret about whether or not buying one would feed into the American Adoration Of All Things That Are Big. I've always had smaller cars. I got all nervous. I looked at a VW Jetta wagon, too. They're nice looking but I don't know about reliability. I've checked out all the stats on the Toyota Matrix. Then J said that if I was looking at Toyotas I might as well look at another Prius and I was like, I don't want a Prius, I want something different, and he was like, what DO you want, which brings me to the current state of indecision.

So for now, I'm soldiering on with the Hyundai. If you listen hard, you can hear me. Because when I drive, the front half of the car rattles like the wheels are gonna fall off. Which is just another thing I'll remember about it, adding more stories to the history of vehicles in the life of one Cara McDonough. Hopefully the story takes a new turn very soon.

The verdict

Something new