Because we flew to Connecticut and back this weekend I allowed myself a favorite airplane indulgence which is to buy magazines I'd normally view as at least a slight waste of time like "People," or even worse, "Us" and "Star." Celebrities are totally awesome to read about. And what is even more awesome is the warped sense of importance these movie-star watchers give to their every day activities. Things like, "Mary Kate loves fruit!" Caption: The diminutive Olsen twin munched on an apple as she waited for her bodyguard to clear a popular clothing store of "Full House" fanatics before she entered. Ok. I made that one up. But FOR REAL "Star" reported in the issue that I was reading yesterday on an encounter that almost occurred between Heath Ledger and Naomi Watts. The problem that could have erupted? Legder and Watts used to be involved and the meeting on Hollywood streets amongst thousands of other ordinary people, the semi-famous and all-out movie stars who've most definitely dated one another or at least had relations of some sort could have been awkward. The magazine went as far as to draw out a map of their individual paths, pointing out that they really did - honestly - almost run into one another but thank the Lord in heaven that it didn't come to that.
Naturally as a result of reading this informative news source cover to cover I started thinking about how I'll someday probably be at least somewhat famous (maybe like the O.C.'s Rachel Bilson or that girl from Joan of Arcadia) and how the magazines will report on my every day actions and whether or not I should upgrade from my Reef flip flops to something a little more hip and how I probably shouldn't dance to "Come on Eileen" in the car anymore. Luckily I've at least got a little dog to carry around. And she'll kick your ass, you paparazzi punks.